Do the thing that scares you...
April has been a busy month indeed; it seems to have come and gone in the blink of an eye and we (I) missed the the blog post this month but perhaps I can explain. At the end of our last blog post, Emma mentioned that I had some exciting news to share; I now have a studio space!
The past month saw me leave the classroom for the second time and physically move all of my things into a new workspace, twenty minutes up the road, in the picturesque village of Horsley. It may sound like my feet didn't touch the ground but one of the nice things about being self employed, amongst all of the scary and overwhelming things, is that you can set the pace. I moved with the help of family and friends in a few trips then spent the second week of the Easter holidays working in my new space, by myself, for a few hours at a time, just settling in. I am really looking forward to developing my work further. After years of teaching and working to commissions or trends, it's taken a bit of time to figure out what it is that I want to do. I've been self employed for 15 years now but this feels like I am embarking upon a new venture; the work I am currently producing feels more personal and has more depth. I think this is the reason I enjoy sharing this work and it's processes in workshops; because it really feels like it is my own. If you'd like to see some of my work, all of the studios are open to the public on the 18th and 19th of May for The Hearth's Open Studios event.
However, one of things I do want to touch upon in this month's post, are the overwhelming mixed bag of feelings that come with taking rather large and sometimes scary steps. Doubt is something that I'm pretty sure a lot of us either have, had or will have to contend with at one point or another. While I was still teaching, I pootled off, portfolio in hand and interviewed for the studio and whilst driving along the A69 I couldn't shake off the feeling that I was an imposter. That I wasn't a "real" artist. What on earth did I think I was doing, interviewing for a studio space?! All I do is a bit of sewing...I can only describe the feeling as being like a heavy weight in my chest. However after a really positive interview I left feeling quite excited (and slightly worried that I'd just talked and talked and talked!) When I got the phone call to say I was successful I have to admit to blubbing a little bit too. Then came the feeling of, "oh heck", this just got real!!! I still occasionally sway wildly between utter excitement and complete panic that I now have overheads to think about, but I have to be honest, it's mostly just excitement. I am looking forwards now and thinking more about future planning than I have done previously. I'm also getting things done; which was the difficulty I faced working from home, or not as was often the case!
I've often found it quite isolating, working from home. It's no joke (although I regularly mention it lightheartedly) that I do spend a lot of time hoovering up Labrador hairs, but I'm also easily distracted by jobs that need doing around the home. It's difficult to procrastinate for too long in a room of your own where you're surrounded only by things you need to create! In two weeks I've managed to get more work done than in two months at home. The welcome has also been very warm, I've had lots of lovely, reassuring feedback about my work and am working within a hub of creative and artistic talent.
So here is to doing the thing that scares you. To pushing yourself that bit further. To letting you take yourself a little bit more seriously and investing in what you do.
To find out more about The Hearth Arts Centre click here.
The past month saw me leave the classroom for the second time and physically move all of my things into a new workspace, twenty minutes up the road, in the picturesque village of Horsley. It may sound like my feet didn't touch the ground but one of the nice things about being self employed, amongst all of the scary and overwhelming things, is that you can set the pace. I moved with the help of family and friends in a few trips then spent the second week of the Easter holidays working in my new space, by myself, for a few hours at a time, just settling in. I am really looking forward to developing my work further. After years of teaching and working to commissions or trends, it's taken a bit of time to figure out what it is that I want to do. I've been self employed for 15 years now but this feels like I am embarking upon a new venture; the work I am currently producing feels more personal and has more depth. I think this is the reason I enjoy sharing this work and it's processes in workshops; because it really feels like it is my own. If you'd like to see some of my work, all of the studios are open to the public on the 18th and 19th of May for The Hearth's Open Studios event.
However, one of things I do want to touch upon in this month's post, are the overwhelming mixed bag of feelings that come with taking rather large and sometimes scary steps. Doubt is something that I'm pretty sure a lot of us either have, had or will have to contend with at one point or another. While I was still teaching, I pootled off, portfolio in hand and interviewed for the studio and whilst driving along the A69 I couldn't shake off the feeling that I was an imposter. That I wasn't a "real" artist. What on earth did I think I was doing, interviewing for a studio space?! All I do is a bit of sewing...I can only describe the feeling as being like a heavy weight in my chest. However after a really positive interview I left feeling quite excited (and slightly worried that I'd just talked and talked and talked!) When I got the phone call to say I was successful I have to admit to blubbing a little bit too. Then came the feeling of, "oh heck", this just got real!!! I still occasionally sway wildly between utter excitement and complete panic that I now have overheads to think about, but I have to be honest, it's mostly just excitement. I am looking forwards now and thinking more about future planning than I have done previously. I'm also getting things done; which was the difficulty I faced working from home, or not as was often the case!
I've often found it quite isolating, working from home. It's no joke (although I regularly mention it lightheartedly) that I do spend a lot of time hoovering up Labrador hairs, but I'm also easily distracted by jobs that need doing around the home. It's difficult to procrastinate for too long in a room of your own where you're surrounded only by things you need to create! In two weeks I've managed to get more work done than in two months at home. The welcome has also been very warm, I've had lots of lovely, reassuring feedback about my work and am working within a hub of creative and artistic talent.
So here is to doing the thing that scares you. To pushing yourself that bit further. To letting you take yourself a little bit more seriously and investing in what you do.
To find out more about The Hearth Arts Centre click here.
You are bloody awesome!
ReplyDeleteSo proud of you for stepping out of your comfort zone, raising your head above the parapet and grabbing the bull by the horns (enough! )
You could never be described as an imposter
You are wonderfully and authentically you
Seize this opportunity
Enjoy every moment
More importantly, create! X